muse

you should find this comforting since you are my muse...

If you’re dating a writer and they don’t write about you — whether it’s good or bad — then they don’t love you. They just don’t. Writers fall in love with the people we find inspiring.

- Jamie Anne Royce 

we are the rebels

we are the lovesick. the fearless ones. the never giving up.
the hearts undone. sick with the desire to love. to live so far
beyond the boundaries given to us. we are the fence-hopping
fools who never stopped to read the signs. the ones that left
the world behind. like dreams we've drawn in neon light. just
moments in the sea of time. we are the lost ones wandering.
the soon to be smoldering. last to be found. the first to fall and
fail to fly then shatter on the ground. we are the rebels running
wild through a darkness that can swallow us. but we've set fire
to our souls. burning brilliant blinding gold. the flames that illuminate
our lonely road. our futures holding fates untold. we are the
ever-refusing to fold. to fade away or worse to lose. the few that
bend and break apart the cages of our rules. born desperate for the
promise of the mystery unknown. we are the lovesick. and just like
the sun we will always rise. hope still shining in our eyes.. - Jason Reeves.

Autumn Loves

Seriously Cannot Wait for these kinds of nights. 

Fall is my favorite. 

forever lost.

i wrote this when we weren't talking & today i found it in papers on my desk....it's like when i read it i went right back to that day. i remembered it. where i was who was there how bad it hurt. i don't want to spend forever wondering if you're going to leave again. i would be quite happy if you stayed forever...i need you to. 

you remind me of the way old books smell & when i'm in this place all i do is wonder where you are because you aren't beside me anymore. it's like waiting for a fog to lift, like i'm in a hazy dream & i can't wake myself up. everything becomes unfamiliar & i'm forever lost without you....

ugh.

this is exactly how i feel about you today. 

Running

i feel in love with her because she made me nervous, a little out of place, uneasy even. she was my adventure in a world that i had made so monotonous. i craved her in a selfish unloving way. & as distant as she is now a part of me still feels her. she engulfs your soul and throws you up like stars in the sky. she pushes & you push back until there is this magnificent explosion shaking your very being. i'm a runner and that's all I'll ever be. 

my idea of beautiful

my heart has 4 empty rooms. 3 wait for lightening & one waits for you. i miss our late nights when we would just stay awake forever & confess everything all of our little secrets, lies, & loves like the sun was never coming back up. like those few hours were all we had left & we had nothing better to do but confess everything. we weren't saving the world we were saving ourselves & maybe for those few hours that's all that  really mattered. everything else faded away & it was just you & me under our blankets wrapped in our thoughts making new dreams. you will & always have been my idea of beautiful.